Given up on internet dating

As difficult as it was, I’m so grateful for this time period. This is hard to admit, but the first thing I would do most mornings was check my messages.

Sometimes that meant a quick five-minute glance; sometimes that meant an hour of wasted time.

But I got the feeling that you were beginning to think I didn’t exist. And I wanted to let you know that while I might be as elusive as a unicorn grazing in a field of four-leaf clovers, I’m close. Have a great weekend and come back on Monday for a juicy reader question from a woman who is ready to toss in the towel on men.

Become that person and you’ll attract that person as well.

On a lazy Sunday afternoon, I was reflecting on some goals I had created for myself at the beginning of the year.

Some were big, like visit Australia (my home) and learn Spanish; some were small, like (finally!

Lasting love is real, but it takes a real self-aware person to be a worthy partner.

It’s really not fair that you’ve had to wait this long, or go on blind dates, endure bad sex, settle for ‘meh’ relationships, feel misunderstood, cry from loneliness, wrap your arms around a pillow as you fall asleep at night. This is my best stuff and I’m giving it to you absolutely free.

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My new book builds on this concept and gives you a step-by-step blueprint to flipping the script from negative to positive, and turning the glass from half-empty to half-full. Since my life isn’t together, I think you’ll reject me. This letter is a call for humility – to stop blaming the opposite sex for the downfall of your relationships and to take responsibility for the things you can control. When I was 31, I hadn’t thrown out the list, my life wasn’t together, I was dating the wrong person, I needed to date more to understand what I like, I wasn’t able to appreciate the right woman until life kicked my ass, and I was too focused on what I was getting instead of what I was giving.So I decided to do something I’d never done before: give up online dating for 40 days. I’m an extremely happy, outgoing person, but during the first few days, a dark cloud came over me.Painful things that I hadn’t thought about for years—including mistakes I’d made in relationships—started to flood my mind.

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